List of recurring Green Wing characters
There are many characters in Green Wing that make numerous appearances, or are referred to but never appear. These are not considered to be main characters, but still play a part in the main plot. This article also features other minor guest characters and actors.
Lyndon Jones (Paterson Joseph)
Lyndon Jones is the head of I.T. at East Hampton. He is a very attractive man, and many of the women staff have taken a shine to him, most notably Joanna Clore. Not surprisingly, many of the men such as Guy and Alan feel threatened by him. Alan went so far as to challenge him to a tug-of-war, which Alan lost.
However, Lyndon is not really interested in the women who admire him, and prefers to keep himself to himself. But it is known that he does have an odd fetish for large underpants. This led him to his attraction to Harriet Schulenburg, who has the biggest underpants in human resources.
During a charity slave auction, Lyndon was bought by Joanna. During the night he made it clear that he found her "Disturbing, tedious and desperate". This did not stop Joanna however, and during another attempt to ask him out, Lyndon got out of it by saying he was on a date with Harriet (who was there when Joanna asked). After they spent the night together, Harriet felt guilty and left him. The incident lead to Harriet being thrown out by her husband Ian. This left the door open for Joanna again, but he only got out of their relationship by claiming he was gay, and kissing Jake Leaf.
Dr. Holly Hawkes (Sally Phillips)
Holly Hawkes was Mac's girlfriend for six years. However, their relationship ended after they had an argument about children. Holly became pregnant, and wanted to have an abortion, but Mac objected. Holly said that a child would be "A spanner in the works", and an obstruction to her career. Eventually Holly had the abortion and they separated.
Holly still kept in touch with the hospital, with Angela often talking to her. She was the first person to tell Mac that she was getting married to John James Wyard and that she was pregnant again. Although that seemed to be the end of it, it was not. Holly left John, and when Angela left the hospital to become an actress, Holly became her replacement as senior registrar in paediatrics.
With Holly back, Caroline feels threatened that she might break up her relationship with Mac, but Holly makes it clear that she is not interested in him. However, this turns out to be a lie. In order to revive Mac's feelings for her, she tells Mac that she never aborted their baby, and that their son Mackenzie is now four years old. Everyone believes her and Holly and Mackenzie move into Mac's flat. Sue White later discovers that Holly just dyed Mackenzie's black hair and that he is not at all blood-related to Mac. After the lie is uncovered, Holly leaves the hospital disgraced.
Ian, Oscar, Jamie, Robbie and Stuart Schulenburg
Harriet's family are her greatest burden on her life. Ian and Harriet met at an evening class, and have been together for some time now. However, their relationship has now gone way downhill. The only time they ever have sex is when Harriet is asleep. They also have problems with condoms. Harriet once admitted that a condom once got lost inside her.
Harriet's four boys are probably even more troublesome. Harriet has to drop them off at school before she arrives at work, often leading to her making mistakes, such as dropping off the wrong thing or person at the wrong place.
Out of all her children, seven-year-old Robbie causes the most trouble. He twitches frequently, often pretends to be dead for several hours, has urinated over the school statue of the Virgin Mary, eats bread straight from the freezer, and on a globe of the world, scribbled out Australia and Denmark because he "Bombed" them. Harriet even brought him into the hospital once. He ruined her desk, and Harriet said to him "I'll see if you can watch an amputation, but I doubt they'll let you cut anything".
Recently, Ian has been thinking of leaving her for Rosie "Pin-Legs Slitty-Eyed" Kendal which led Harriet to have a night of passion with Lyndon. However, Ian discovered what had happened, and threw her out of the house.
Oliver (Keir Charles)
Oliver is one of the few men working in human resources. Not much is known about him, except that it is known that he does use office equipment for his own personal use, and that he smokes.
Oliver is one of the many men that has had sex with Rachel, but it is known that he is often involved in all the perverted acts done by the women in the department. He has even licked cream off their faces and chests.
He also often takes part in the rather odd games that the women play in the department, such as falling to the ground every time the telephone rings.
Lady Emily "Emmy" Lewis Westbrook (Daisy Haggard)
Emmy is a physiotherapist, and a member of the aristocracy, who is considered to be one of the more attractive women in the hospital. She ranks top of Guy's list of women in the hospital. Mac even dates her. Caroline and Angela however, are rather jealous, and consider her to have too wide a mouth. Guy also seems to think so to an extent as well, as in Series One, she delivers him a letter from his father and Guy initiates a scenario in which he causes her to become rather emotional and succeeds in getting her to agree to go with him for a drink. After she leaves on the verge of tears, he comments "I'll have to try that one day with someone with smaller teeth".
When Mac announces that he is moving to Sheffield, Emmy also plans to move up north with him, much to Caroline's horror. Caroline then goes out of her way to find anything wrong with Sheffield. When she fails, she tries to dig dirt on Emmy. She discovers that she was jailed for "Forging physiotherapist qualifications" amongst other things on her criminal record. The plan backfires however when Emmy reveals it's a different Emily Lewis-Westbrook.
Emmy is angered at Mac's reaction to Caroline and his failure to take the incident seriously. She throws a pint of beer over him (off-screen) and leaves for Sheffield without him.
Liam (Oliver Milburn)
Liam is Angela's boyfriend in series 1. They get on very well, and Liam often claims that she absolutely perfect, except for the fact that "She dances like a wolf".
Liam is extremely rich, although he never shows it. He dresses in rather ordinarily and drives a slightly battered Volvo PV544. It is not discovered that is wealthy until after Angela decides to dump him. She leaves a message on his mobile telling him that she does not like "The way that he eats, as well as other things". He proposes to her, and gives her a wedding ring which is part of a large set of jewellery. However, just as Angela changes his mind, Liam receives Angela's message on his mobile. He promptly leaves her. In the final version of the episode, this scene is cut out.
Cordelia Denby (Saskia Wickham)
Cordelia is the hospital chaplain. She provides the staff and patients with moral and religious guidance. When Joanna dumped Alan, he turned to Christianity because he thought that Cordelia was a very attractive woman. However, Cordelia just tried to ignore him.
She has also helped Martin when he discovered that he and Guy were related, and comforted Caroline, Sue, Karen and Angela when Guy went mad and stole an ambulance. Despite appearing clean cut and gentle, her response to discovering that Guy was Joanna's son was "You're fucking joking!"
Charles Robertson (Robert Harley)
Charles Robertson is the Chief Executive Officer (CEO) of East Hampton Hospital Trust. Not much is known about Charles, although it is safe to assume that unlike most of the staff at the hospital, his life is much closer to normality.
Charles basically takes meetings, but he is also the head of tribunals. He was in charge of the tribunal of Guy Secretan, which later reinstated his job as an anaesthetist. He was also the auctioneer at the charity slave auction.
Jake Leaf (Darren Boyd)
First appearing in series 2, Jake is a complementary therapist, dealing with more alternative therapies such as acupuncture. Amongst his patients include Joanna (after she slept with Guy) and Alan (who wanted him to relieve his sexual tension).
Another patient was Caroline, who visited him in order for her to forget Mac after he seemed to be falling in love with Holly again. After this encounter, Jake becomes attracted to Caroline (while Guy's infatuation with her develops at the same time).
Despite Guy's best attempts to stop him, Jake manages to successfully ask Caroline out, who is now also feeling attracted to Jake. With Caroline's help, he attempts to trick Guy into thinking that he's a professional Guyball player, claiming to have a settle-rate of 37. He succeeds due to Guy "forgetting" his own settle-rate.
The date goes pear-shaped however. During the night, Jake shows Caroline his most prized possession, a 12-year-old tamagochi pet. Caroline accidentally drops it in to a glass of wine, killing it. Jake gets heavily drunk to restrain himself. Later, when Jake drops Caroline off, Guy takes it upon himself to get rid of Jake, by throwing a Swiss Army Knife with Guy's house keys attached at Jake. It hits Jake and gets stuck in his head, who bleeds all over his face and becomes drowsy while Guy does a victory mantra in his bedroom.
Afterwards, Jake is dumped by Caroline after she receives news that Mackenzie is not, in fact, Mac's biological son. Jake goes drinking with Lyndon in the local pub to drown his sorrows and the two become good friends. Unfortunately, Joanna Clore is in the pub and breaks the conversation up attempting to chat-up Lyndon. To put Joanna off, both Lyndon and Jake claim that they are gay. Joanna calls their bluff and gets them to prove it by kissing each other, which they reluctantly agree to rather than put up with Joanna.
Dr. Jon Jennings (Pip Torrens)
After the crash, neurosurgeon Dr. Jon Jennings is put in charge of Mac's case. He is constantly harassed by Caroline who wants to know if Mac will ever recover from his amnesia and remember their relationship.
Although not much is known about him personally, he does smoke, and it is known that he does not like giving out bad news, which made it very difficult for him to tell Mac that his injuries were much more serious than first thought, and that in fact he is dying.
He does have the rather odd quirk of pretending to ride a horse whilst walking down the hospital corridors.
Markus Geissler is a character that never appears Green Wing, but is frequently mentioned. Markus, known as "The Big Austrian", is one of the world's best Guyball players. He is Guy's biggest rival in the sport, and they have played against each other on a few occasions. The first time we hear of him, we learn that Guy walked over him, because Markus was suffering from shin splints.
According to Green Wing - The Complete First Series Scripts, Markus was sent off in a match between him and Guy, after "Illegal use of the "hefty fondue"." He lost the match 12:3.
These are guest actors who have had only small characters.
- Car Salesman (John Oliver) - Tries to sell a car to Joanna, but only gets abused and hit on when he says that none of the cars can make her look young, "As they are both just cars."
- Lab Technician (Stephen Merchant) - Works in the path lab. Has a very sarcastic and dry sense of humour. In the end credits, "technician" is spelt with an extra "-ian" on the end. Whether it was deliberate or a mistake is not known.
- Julian "Scissors" Bentley (Kevin Eldon) - A hit-barber whom Guy considers paying £200 to cut Mac's hair.
- Just a Man (Nick Frost) - Just a man in the hospital bar that Guy talks to about the ambulance accident. He is one of many men Joanna has had a one night stand with.
- Patrick the Director (Peter McDonald) Patrick is an Irish director that comes to make a documentary about the hospital. Was presumably making a program starring Angela in Toronto before her death involving a moose.
- Terry - A cleaner at the hospital who is friends with Mac in series one. Guy attempts to be friendly with him to "prove" to Mac that he has friends in the lower working-class, but the attempt backfires.
Other famous actors and actresses who appear in Green Wing include Rosie Cavaliero, who appears in both series as different characters. She plays Teacher in "Slave Auction" and Voice Coach in Series 2, Episode 5.
- Green Wing "microsite" biography of Lyndon Jones