List of Still Game episodes

Jack has become increasingly annoyed at his disruptive neighbors. He takes a walk with Victor to their local pub, the Clansman, as they complain about their run-down Glasgow neighborhood, Craiglang. On the way, Jack attempts to persuade Victor to let Jack move into his apartment, an idea which Victor is highly against. However, the pair hear from Isa (who lives on Victor's floor of the Osprey Heights apartment building) that the owner of the apartment next to Victor's, old man Hannigan, has just died. Jack immediately latches onto the idea of moving into the apartment, and, under the guise of being mourners at Hannigan's wake, he and Victor examine it, managing to embarrass themselves hugely in the process. Reasonably pleased with what he has seen, Jack makes plans to move into the apartment. However, the beat-up truck cheaply arranged to move Jack's belongings bursts into flames shortly after setting off on the journey to Osprey Heights, destroying all of Jack's belongings. Meanwhile, Winston is trying to train his grandson, Joe, for a boxing match. Despite Joe's short, scrawny build and obvious lack of talent for the sport, Winston keeps pushing him, much to the annoyance of the locals, who clearly see that there is nothing in it. During the fight (shown in a brief post-credits sequence), Joe is flattened within seconds.

Notes: There are several comments made in this episode that counteract developments later in the series. Victor states that his son in Johannesburg is named Jamie (in all other versions his son is called John). He also refers to Jack as being 74 years old, while all later mentions of Jack's age have him at 72. Bobby the Barman also implies that he has a family in this episode, though every other episode but "Faimly" (in which he is said to have a wife) strongly imply that he is single and has no children.

Victor receives a message on his answering machine from his son, John, who states that he will be in the UK with his wife and children and will make a detour to Scotland to see Victor. However, Victor stuggles to make out the time his son will be arriving at the train station, due to a large amount of background noise. He and Jack take the tape to their neighbor Shug, so nicknamed for his incredibly large ears ("lug" being the Scots word for "ear"). Shug is an expert with electronics, though he has an irritating habit of launching into long stories about his time as a soldier. He promises to find out when John is arriving. In the Clansman, Victor reflects on his history with his son. John has apparently often told Victor that he would visit him, and then not showed up. This is interrupted by Shug, who hands victor the tape and says that he is certain that John's train will be arriving at 2:30. Despite this, Jack and Victor go to the train station at ten in the morning. After growin more and more bored waiting, the pair fall asleep at two, only waking up at 4:30. Horrified, Victor frantically leaves the station with Jack. As they approach Victor's apartment, they hear voices coming from inside. An overjoyed Victor thinks it is his son's family, but is disappointed to find Winston and Isa. Winston was injured after fighting with Peggy McAlpine for over gigot chops at the butcher's, breaking his arm. Thoroughly angry that Victor and Jack neglected him during the hospital's visiting hour, Winston was let into Victor's apartment by Isa, who had been cleaning for him. Victor decides to put the day's incident behind him, and he and the others eat the desserts that he had prepared for his family.

Notes: This is the first time that Victor has called his son "John." As "Jack" is a common nickname for men named "John," it seems likely that Victor's son was named after Jack. John is Victor's only known child. All of the episodes in Still Game's first series, bar "Flittin'," were broadcast in the incorrect order when they first aired on the BBC. Though intended to be second, this was in fact the fourth episode of the show that many viewers saw.

It is the heart of the winter and Craiglang is experiencing a brutal cold snap. Jack is meaning to bring his friend Wullie Napier a loaf of bread that he'd promised him. He and Victor go to Wullie's floor and find his apartment unlocked, dark, and cold. Upon entering, they find Wullie sitting on his sofa, dead. After being initially startled, Jack and Victor try to call Wullie's son using his phone, but find the line dead. After leaving the bread in Wullie's motionless arms, Jack and Victor proceed to ask his grubby, hostile neighbor Frankie (frequently referred to as "Manky Frankie") to use his phone. After Jack begins rambling about unrelated matters to Wullie's son over the phone, an annoyed Victor bluntly relates the bad news to him and hangs up. At the Clansman, Jack and Victor are horrified to find that there is an ongoing bet on who will die next due to the cold. The pair then go to see Winston. Stunned at how hot his apartment is, Victor and Jack inquire as to Winston's secret. Winston reveals that he has tampered with his meter to allow him to use electricity without having to pay for it. Jack is interested, but, ever-honest, Victor convinces him that it is morally wrong. The pair visit many locations around the town, including Navid's shop, the Bookie's, and the local cafe, finding all of them unusually warm. After the pair confront Winston for this, he and Tam reveal that Victor and Jack are both good money in the death bet for not taking free electricity. Jack is convinced and sides with Winston and Tam. This infuriates Victor, now one of the only pensioners with a cold apartment. Victor becomes belligerent towards Jack, Winston, and Tam, and is stunned to find that it is even hot in the church at Wullie's funeral. That night, as Victor is shivering in bed while still dressed in winter gear, Jack and Winston knock at his door. Victor finally softens up and takes the electricity. Unfortunately, all of his subsequent electricity usage plunges the rest of Craiglang into darkness.

Notes: Wullie Napier is the first of three minor characters with that name to crop up in Still Game. The second is Wullie Macintosh, introduced in the Series 1 episode "Waddin." He also had a brief appearance in the Series 3 episode "Swottin." The actor who played him died shortly afterward, so Wullie Macintosh never appeared again. He was distinguished by a large purple birthmark on his forehead, as well as his habit of borrowing things and not giving them back. The third Wullie, Wullie Reid, appeard in the "Kill Wullie" in Series 4. A bit of a womanizer, Wullie Reid began a relationship with a significantly younger woman.

This episode marks the first major appearance of series regulars Eric and Pete the Jakey. Manky Frankie is also introduced, though he only appeared in one more episode. In the original, incorrect BBC broadcast, this episode ran second.

Jack and Victor go to the local Charity Shop in town. While Victor playfully attempts to chat up Barbara, the shopkeeper, Jack stares silently at the ground. Sensing that all is not well, Victor takes Jack aside and asks him what the matter is. It transpires that Jack has a crush on Barbara. Victor encourages Jack to ask her out, but Jack gets cold feet and sprints out of the shop. Later, at Jack's apartment, Victor asks him what happened. Jack reveals that he is nervous about asking another woman out, out of respect to his own dead wife. Victor again encourages Jack, telling him that he has mourned enough. The next day, Jack successfully asks Barbara out and manages to set up a double date of sorts, with Victor meeting Barbara's sister, Edith. The date goes well for Jack, but Victor is horrified to find that Edith is, in fact a diminutive, stocky, mole-covered woman with an odd croaking voice. After this, Jack begins spending more and more time with Barbara, ignoring Victor, who steadily grows more and more jealous and skeptical of the relationship. His skepticism turns out to be well-founded, as Isa informs Victor that Barbara has a husband. Victor confronts Barbara, who admits that her husband has no idea of her relationship with Jack. At that moment, Jack bursts into the charity shop and invites both Barbara and Victor over for a steak dinner. Both Victor and Barbara reluctantly accept. Later, at his apartment, Jack receives a phone call from Barbara, explaining why she cannot see him any more. Jack decides to put the whole episode behind him, and he and Victor split the third steak. In a more light-hearted subplot, Winston gets barred from the Clansman by Bobby for obnoxiously rejecting a pint of lager. Winston resorts first to hanging out with a group of local neds. He then tries another local pub, Brown's (renamed "The Thirsty Laird"), which he had not been in for 15 years, as it was known for the high number of murders that occurred within its walls. Initially impressed by the pub's reinvention of itself, Winston hastily leaves when a hooded figure enters and shoots a middle-aged man playing at the pool table. Outside the window, Winston asks Bobby how he can get back into the Clansman, and Bobby says that he must apologize. Refusing, Winston disguises himself by wearing a false mustache, trench-coat, and hat. Bobby instantly sees through Winston's disguise, but decides to let him back in anyway.

Notes: It is not clear why Winston is shown removing his glasses after revealing his disguise--in all other appearances, he is shown wearing them.

Victor states that his wife has been dead two years longer than Jack's. However, in the second series' episode "Brief," it is shown on gravestones that Victor's wife died in 1993, while Jack's died in 1991. It is unclear which set of dates is correct.

This was Barbara's only appearance in Still Game. Her famously unattractive sister, Edith, later appeared in the Series 3 episode "Swottin" and the Series 6 episode "Hot Seat," as well as the Christmas special "A Plum Number."

This episode was broadcast third in the original run of the show.

Navid's daughter is getting married, so he begins to hand out wedding invitations to select customers in his shop. Many of the pensioners are keen on attending, and begin to go to great lengths to get invitations. Meanwhile, Jack is annoying Victor by endlessly chattering about a toaster that he wants to buy. The pair decide to go out, where they find Winston, who tells them that Wullie Macintosh, an old acquaintance, has just died. After talking among themselves, it transpires that Wullie had a habit of borrowing things and not giving them back. Victor, Jack, and Winston, along with Tam, decide to let themselves into Wullie's house and reclaim their long-lost items. After talking to more friends at Wullie's funeral, the four realize that Wullie's borrowing problem was much worse than it originally seemed--most of the pensioners had lent Wullie items that he had failed to return. Winston takes back a painting of the Taj Mahal which he says he will give to Navid, thus guaranteeing him an invitation to the wedding. Many of the other customers of Navid's shop also begin receiving invitations at around this time, including Isa. Jack and Victor go to Navid's shop, hoping for invitations, but Navid only gives them a newspaper. Frustrated, the two go to the Clansman, only to find that the majority of the customers have invitations. They are particularly hurt when they find out that Bobby has an invitation. Peggy McAlpine then pretends to offer Jack and Victor the invitations she and her husband Charlie had received, only revealing the deception after the pair reluctantly accept. Jack and Victor are laughed at by the entire pub, at which point, furious and hurt, the pair begin to storm out. Suddenly, an invitation with Victor's name on it drops from the paper Navid had given them. Nearly fainting with happiness, Victor fails to notice Jack dejectedly leaving the pub. Just then, Pete the Jakey walks in, clutching an invitation and claiming that he is going to go to the wedding. Skeptical, Jack looks at Pete's invitation and sees his own name. Realizing that the invitation must have fallen out of the newspaper, he joins Victor in celebration. Later, at the wedding, Victor and Jack are horrified to realize that there is no alcohol due to Navid's family being Muslim. However, they are cheered up due to the fact that Winston has worn a kilt with drinks under it. Meanwhile, it turns out that Wullie Macintosh is, in fact, alive, and that he had been in hospital next to a person that had the same name as him. Dejectedly, Wullie enters the Clansman and tells Victor, Jack, Tam, and Winston that his house has been robbed. To compensate, Victor gleefully hands Wullie Jack's newly-purchased toaster, which Jack had once again been annoying everyone with.

Notes: The dimwitted and lazy but well-intentioned postman, Chris (aka "Chris the postie"), makes his debut in this episode.

This episode ran last in the original broadcast.

Jack and Victor attend a local film screening. Their enjoyment of the movie, however, is dampened by a couple sitting in front of them who are loudly referencing actors and other films as well as arguing over provisions. Frustrated, Jack and Victor ask for their money back (which they only get after much nagging and various personal insults to the ticket booth worker, Simon). On their way out of the theatre, they run into Tam. When Tam is asked why he is even going to see a film, an activity which he normally doesn't care for, he responds that he has won free access to the theatre for a year--snacks included--by entering a competition. Annoyed at Tam's boasts, Victor and Jack decide that they will try to beat him at his own game. They ask Navid about any upcoming contests. Navid tells them that there is currently a contest for coming up with a slogan for scones. He also reveals that Tam has bought his entire stock of scones to maximize his chances of winning, greatly irritating Jack and Victor, who are reduced to buying the last remaining packages from another shop. Unfortunately, Jack and Victor do not demonstrate a great ability to come up with catchy slogans in twenty words or less, with Jack being particularly bad at it (his tendency to ramble does not do the pair any favours). Tam, much to Jack's and Victor's disappointment, wins the competition with his entry "S'gone!" The pair complain to Navid, who makes matters worse by telling them that their own entry, "Sconnae no dae that," is stale. Jack and Victor decide to admit defeat. Meanwhile, Winston runs into financial trouble when his pension is stopped due to several months' worth of deceitful invalidity claims. Horror-struck, Winston first tries to salvage his remaining money by betting at the bookie's. After losing, Winston tries to get a pint by paying Bobby with glass bottles. He responds belligerently when Bobby tells him that he doesn't take bottles, leading Bobby to throw him out. As a last resort, Winston takes the only thing he can get for free--a tin of cat food from Navid's. However, he soon discovers that the cat food tin has a 300 pound prize on it. Crisis averted, Winston goes back to his old way of life. Meanwhile, Harry, Isa's estranged husband, has returned after a long absence. Eager to take him back, Harry takes advantage of Isa's good nature, while skirting questions about where he has been. Harry gets a decidedly hostile reception from the other pensioners, who make it clear that he is not welcome in the community after the way he hurt Isa. Eventually, Jack, Victor, and Winston find Isa sitting tearfully in a cafe, who reveals that Harry told her he was going to use the bathroom half an hour previously and never came back, and that her wallet is missing. Harry gets a painful surprise when Jack and Victor find him stuck in the bathroom window after a failed escape attempt.

Notes: This episode ran fifth in the original broadcast.

"Scones" marks the first appearance of Harry, Isa's philandering husband. Harry reappeared in Series 2's "Dug" and in a flashback in the Hogmanay special "The Party." In the Series 6 episode "Hot Seat," it is revealed that Harry has died. The actor who played him, Ronnie Letham, died in 2008.

"Sconnae no dae that," Jack's and Victor's failed slogan entry, might be a reference to the famous "Gonnae no dae that" running gag from Ford Kiernan's and Greg Hemphill's earlier sketch show, Chewin' the Fat, of which Still Game is technically a spinoff.

Isa is sitting in Glasgow's George Square with a friend. She comments on how much she enjoys sitting in the square and enjoying the atmosphere, but is interrupted by a yelling from behind her. It turns out that there is a man behind her, jumping around and screaming in his underwear, while being restrained by the police. Meanwhile, Jack and Victor are eating lunch in a local park. Contrasting Isa's previous comments, the two comment that they hate the park due to its litter-strew, run-down vibe. These sentiments are only heightened when Jack realizes that he has dog stool on his feet. Two neds with a Rottweiler come walking along the path to the bench that Jack and Victor are sitting on. One ned orders the dog to sit right between Victor's legs. The dog then defecates at Victor's feet and proceeds to eat Jack's sandwich. After rudely interrogating Jack and Victor as to whether they think that the neds should clean the Rottweiler faeces, they leave. Victor and Jack decide not to go back to the park. Meanwhile, Isa sees Tam bringing potted plants into Osprey heights. She questions Tam, but he will not give a reason for why he is carrying them. Later, Jack and Victor witness Winston with a plant. After they inquire about it, Winston says that he can't tell them for fear of Isa finding out. Jack and Victor also hear that their old acquaintance, Ronnie (the man in George Square), has been committed to a sanatorium. Ronnie had been a contestant on a quiz show, with his knowledge of World War II, but missed an obvious answer, causing him to lose the competition and having an extreme negative effect on his confidence. Jack and Victor decide to go and visit Ronnie, where they realize that nothing is really wrong with him--he just had one "funny turn." The pair pretend to be his brothers to sign him out of the sanatorium. Meanwhile, Isa is furious at not knowing what the reason behind the potted plants is. Winston reluctantly agrees to show her (after Isa blackmails him by threatening to call the council), but on the condition that she does not tell anybody. Isa promises, but immediately after Winston shows her, she runs off to tell everyone. This causes Winston to go to extreme lengths to restrain Isa, much to her annoyance. Finally, the secret project is declared finished, and Jack and Victor, among others, are treated to a new park on the roof of Osprey Heights that is ned-free. Everybody is overjoyed with the park, particularly Ronnie, who, unfortunately, is shouting with glee, once again in only his underwear. Later, while enjoying the park, Jack, Victor, and Winston are horrified to see that the two neds from the dirty park have found their way up to the top of Osprey Heights, and have brought their "devil dug (dog)," intending to make it their new hangout. Winston angrily tells them to leave the park alone, brandishing a large stick. One of the neds grabs the stick and throws it over the edge of the roof, which the dog promptly chases after and falls over twenty stories to its death. The neds are horrified.

Notes: This episode marks the introduction of an updated title sequence. The concept is still the same (Jack and Victor aging from boys to pensioners) but several of their "stages" of life have been changed to reflect the culture of the time periods (Elvis-like hairstyles in the 1950s and turtlenecks and long hair in the 1960s).

Winston hires a home help, falsely claiming that his leg is sore. However, Mrs. Begg, the woman he has hired, does not believe his story for a second. She cannot stop helping him, though, as she has no proof that his leg injury is fake. Mrs. Begg also resists Winston's romantic advances, to his disappointment. To make his "bad leg" as convincing as possible, Winston takes to limping with a cane even outside of his house, for fear that Mrs. Begg (or someone who knows her) will see him. Though made fun of by most of the pensioners (and chastised by Jack and particularly the ever-honest Victor), Winston sticks to his act. Mrs. Begg, meanwhile, is stopped by Isa, who interrogates her as to whom she is tending. When Mrs. Begg mentions Winston's name, Isa scoffs, but they both spot Winston walking with Jack and Victor, cane in hand and limping. Isa admits that he must really have a sore leg. However, some time later, Isa sees Winston running by, and rushes into Navid's shop to tell him that Winston must be better. Conveniently, Mrs. Begg happens to be in the shop at the same time, rushes to the place Isa says Winston must be going (the bookie's) and catches him without his cane and with no apparent injury. She bans him from using her help. Meanwhile, Jack and Victor plan to visit their old friend, Bert Findley, who has made his first appearance outside in some time. Bert's wife has been dead for several years, and he is in a deep depression. Victor and Jack are mildly horrified to find Bert's house with clothes strewn everywhere and junk all over the floor. The pair do manage to cheer Bert up to some extent, and he later asks if they will meet him at the Clansman. However, Bert does not show, making Jack and Victor suspicious. The two, along with Winston, go to Bert's house to ask why he did not turn up. Bert answers the door with a razor in his hand, and shows off the his newly-cleaned house. Jack immediately suspects that Bert is about to commit suicide, citing the razor and a comment Bert has made about everything being "in order," as well as returning a package of cookies, saying that he won't need them, as classic example of signs of suicide. After hearing water running in the bathroom, the three decide to investigate, despite Bert's pleas to them to not enter. When they open the door, they are stunned to find Mrs. Begg in the shower. They realize that Mrs. Begg has been having an affair with Bert. Winston immediately says that his "sore leg" is playing up again, and Mrs. Begg angrily agrees to let him use her home help service again out of embarrassment.

Notes: Winston's faked leg injury is juxtaposed in Series 3's "Aff," where his former smoking habit leads him to need a leg amputation. After the operation, Winston has a wooden leg, and always walks with a real limp.

While having a meal in the Clansman, Jack and Victor notice their old friend Stuart Anderson getting out of a new car. They are confused, as Stuart was known in the community for being in terrible shape and appearing to be at death's door. Stuart goes into the Clansman, orders an orange juice, and sees Jack and Victor. After witnessing Stuart walk jauntily over to them and speak with a loud, clear, voice, they ask him how he underwent such a transformation. Stuart reveals that he is on a new American "wonder drug" for depression, which he is testing for the doctors. Amazed at the wonders it is working on Stuart, Jack and Victor contemplate getting their hands on the new drug. However, Victor in particular is skeptical about the plan, saying that Stuart really needed the drugs but that they don't. He does eventually agree to it, and the two practice pretending to be depressed at Victor's flat. Their performance at the doctor's office the next day is convincing enough to earn both of them the American drug. They take it the next morning, with great effect--they become hyperactive and oddly chatty, to the point where even Isa is shaken up by their intense conversation. They do, however, invigorate a local dance with their exuberance. Later, they are using the bathroom stalls when Stuart walks into the bathroom. He hears them mention that they have been drinking. Horrified, Stuart tells them that they were not supposed to drink alcohol on top of the drugs, due to side effects. Jack and Victor exit the stalls and are aghast to see that their skin has turned a splotchy brown color. Meanwhile, Winston is attempting to ask Frances, a worker at the local library, out on a date, but just as he is chatting her up, Tam butts in. To Winston's fury, Frances is smitten with Tam and his literary knowledge. Tam asks Frances out on a date in the Clansman, where he runs into Winston. Winston is furious when Tam deliberately points out Winston's tabloid in front of Frances and subsequently asks him what specific plays he has been to (Winston had told Frances that he enjoyed the theatre), knowing full well that Winston would not be able to answer the question. He decides to get even with Tam. However, Tam later apologizes, saying that he didn't mean to make Winston look stupid. Later that night, Tam opens his new library book only to find a stool in the pages. His screams of horror echo into the night.

Notes: This episode establishes that Tam has a grandson, named Ryan, but is unmarried. In a later episode, it is stated that Tam had a wife who left him because he cheated on her.

Jack and Victor are in a local cemetery visiting their wives' gravestones. Victor talks to his wife's gravestone as though she were there (causing Jack to call him a "creepy bastard") and mentions that he is thinking of getting back out on the road. An acquaintance has just died, and his wife is selling his old car, holding an auction. Also intent on getting the car are Tam and Manky Frankie. At the bidding, Victor, Tam, and Frankie try furiously to get it. The bids quickly rise, and Victor finally bets 400 pounds and gets the car. However, Victor has to beg Jack to put in a quarter of the money, not having 400 pounds. Jack agrees when Victor explains how a car is infinitely preferable to a bus or a taxi. The next morning, Victor and Jack climb into their new car and, seeing Frankie tending to his motorcycle, taunt him for losing the bid. Enraged, Frankie runs at the car, but Victor quickly drives away, splashing Frankie with water from a puddle. Victor and Jack drive all over Craiglang and into the surrounding areas (Loch Lomond makes an appearance). However, they demonstrate that they have not kept up with the times, driving oddly slowly and being horrified at the price of petrol. Victor also berates Jack for trying to light his pipe in the petrol station. However, the pair agree that it was a great day, and, while driving home, they see Frankie on the sidewalk. They mean-spiritedly splash him again with puddle water. This does nothing to help Frankie's already sour mood. The next day, some of the fun has worn off. Jack spends fifteen minutes talking to Eric after buying his groceries while, irritated, Victor honks at him to get back in the car. Jack gets into the passenger's seat and says, "take me to the Clansman." This infuriates Victor, who (being the one actually doing all of the driving) feels that he is being treated by Jack as a personal chauffeur. Annoyed by Victor's behavior, Jack moves to the back seat and belligerently yells at Victor to take him to the Clansman. Later, Victor is about to go to sleep in his house, when a very drunk Frankie knocks at his door and tells him that he has "been sorted." Victor then receives a phone call from Jack, who pleads with Victor to drive him home. Reluctantly, Victor agrees, but finds that Frankie has let the air out of one of his tires. Victor, tired and angry, arrives at the Clansman, only to find that Jack has invited all of their friends into the car. Victor is furious with Jack, and his sentiment is only heightened when Jack drops his fish supper all over the floor of the car, and Eric vomits on the windshield. As he is pulling up to Osprey Heights, Victor crashes into Frankie's motorcycle. Frankie witnesses this from his window and vows to get even. The next morning, Jack apologizes, and Victor accepts, but makes him clean out the inside of the car, which Victor has decided to sell to Tam. Jack tells Victor that he has had his fun out of the car, and urges him to ask for his original 300 pounds back. Despite Tam's protests, he is forced to pay all of the money. The moment the cash leaves his hands, a large refrigerator crashes through the roof of the car. Tam is horror-struck by Frankie's final act of revenge, as he has wasted a large sum of money.

Notes: This episode implies that for unknown reasons, Jack is unable to drive. In all scenes, Victor is shown driving, and in fact Victor is the only one of the two who has any interest in the car. Jack does, however, drive in "All the Best," from the fifth series of the show. Jack is also seen driving in Chewin the fat.

Jack is grumbling to himself about the quality of the food available in the price range of his pension when Victor walks in the door, jauntily carrying a bottle of good-quality wine. When Jack asks Victor how he got the cash for the wine, Victor reveals that both he and Jack have saved too much money for their funerals. He tells Jack that if they take several money-saving ventures, such as ditching the following car and opting for a cremation instead of a casket burial, they will have several hundred pounds of "free money." Victor proposes that the two live the high life for a week. Coincidentally, at the same time, a sleazy-looking money-lender appears in Craiglang. Jack and Victor tell him that they are not interested in his business. The next day, they show up in Navid's shop, kitted out in fancy turtleneck sweaters and brand-new shoes. Jack also asks for a more costly brand of tobacco than his usual. Navid sees that the pair have "disposable income" and takes them into his back room. He teaches Jack and Victor about the stock market, and the pair decide to put some of their money into a company called Chromotron UK. Meanwhile, Isa, who has been eavesdropping, assumes that Jack and Victor have borrowed from the money-lender. She soon takes 100 pounds from him and begins spreading the news. Soon the entire community has taken money. When Jack and Victor find out, they are horrified, believing that the money-lender charges 100 percent interest per week. They go to the Clansman and lecture the others on how borrowing money will spell the end of the community. However, the money-lender himself appears on the scene, and reveals that he charges reasonable rates, similar to banks. Jack and Victor soften their stance on money-lending, and buy the man a beer. Meanwhile, Winston and Tam are trying to play a round at their local golf course; however, local neds hassle them. Furious, Winston and Tam challenge the neds to game of golf, on the condition that if the pensioners win, the neds will have to leave the course alone. The neds agree to the challenge. Despite playing a close game, Winston and Tam win. However, the neds order them to strip and bury them in a sand trap.

Notes: Two of the ned characters in this episode are played by the same actors that featured in "Gairden." It is not clear whether or not they are supposed to be the same characters, as these neds show no sign that they had ever encountered Winston or Tam before (the neds in "Gairden" had extensive dealings with Winston in paricular).

In a brief post-credits sequence, the manager of Chromotron UK (the company that Jack and Victor invest in) is shown hanging up the phone and promptly leaping from his upper-floor window.

This episode marks one of the first, if not the first, appearances of Victor's catch-phrase, "That's plenty!"

Navid receives news that his brother has died. He and Meena make plans to attend the funeral in India, but are reluctant to close the shop. Navid asks Jack and Victor to run the store for him in his absence. Though initially reluctant, Jack and Victor accept. Meanwhile, a man named Vince Gallagher appears in the Clansman. Vince runs a catering business, and has parked himself next to a construction site, where the workers are regular customers to his food truck. Vince is obsessed with cleanliness, and rejects two of Bobby's pints due to the dirtiness of the glassware. The next day, Winston passes by Vince's catering van. Winston is furious to see Vince back in Craiglang. He reveals that Vince gave an entire shipyard full of workers, including himself, violent food poisoning with bad stew. Back in Navid's, Jack and Victor competently, if somewhat archaically, run the store. Winston wanders in, feeling left out and wanting to help in the shop. He then suggests that he, Victor, and Jack begin a temporary hot food business using Navid's ingredients. Again, Jack and Victor are reluctant, but agree when Winston maintains that all of the original costs of the ingredients will be taken and given to Navid. Word of the new hot food source soon spreads, and Vince is horrified to see all of his customers walk straight past his van on their way to Navid's, where Jack, Victor, and Winston are happily dealing out sausage rolls, hot dogs, and vegetable stew. The next evening, after another day of good business, Jack, Victor, and Winston head to the Clansman. They are stunned to see the place nearly deserted, and a replacement barman behind the counter. The barman tells them that Bobby has fallen ill, when Winston suddenly loses control of his bowels. The barman notes that Bobby was taken with the same sickness. It transpires that everyone who had the stew became ill shortly afterward. The lone customer in the bar is Vince, who says grimly, "I like it quiet." The next day, Winston is not feeling much better. Jack and Victor are confused, as there were no bad ingredients in the stew. However, when reviewing security camera footage from the previous day, Victor notices Vince enter the shop and empty a huge amount of laxatives into the bubbling stew. Furious, they vow to get even, letting cockroaches and maggots loose in Vince's van. Now ruined and with his reputation in tatters, Vince drives his van straight through the wall of Navid's shop and flees the scene just as Navid arrives back from India. Jack and Victor decide not to tell Navid the reason for the attack.

Notes: Winston reveals in this episode that he worked in the Clyde shipyards in his younger days (a fact that is brought up occasionally later on, notably in the series five episode "Smoke on the Water"). He the only major character to have their pre-pensioner occupation explicitly revealed.

While he and Jack are watching TV, Victor is surprised when his friend hands him a personally engraved tankard in honor of the 60th anniversary of their friendship. Jack, on the other hand, is enraged when Victor reveals that he had not gotten Jack a gift, as he had forgotten all about the date. Feeling guilty, Victor offers to take Jack into town and treat him to a nice meal and a good day out. Jack accepts, and the two reminisce about the day they met. (A tram had knocked down a boy named Frank McCallum, who was badly injured. Victor was sent to get help, and rushed, crying, into Jack's father's butcher shop. Victor met Jack, and a long-running friendship was born.) The next day, as the pair prepare to board their bus into central Glasgow, Winston tags along. Jack and Victor tell Winston that he is not wanted, as this was to be a special day for the two of them. Winston is furious, insulting them from outside the bus window. In the city, Jack and Victor visit many shops, including a luxury tobacco store (from which they are expelled after Jack tries every single brand before settling on his usual budget variety) and a mall (where Jack falls asleep on a reclining chair and Victor tries on a pair of modern sneakers). When they get to the restaurant, however, they are appalled by the prices. Nervously, they tell their waiter that they will only have the inexpensive ice cream. However, the waiter, a kindly young man named Norman, tells them that he will take care of their bill, saying that his own father would have a heart attack at the expensive food. Jack and Victor fully enjoy their feast; however, just as Norman is about to take care of the bill, he is fired for smoking. Horror-struck, Victor has to pay 140 pounds when the restaurant's owner presents him with the bill. Though disgruntled with the episode in the restaurant, Victor's spirits are brought back up when Jack takes him to the Museum of Transport and they inspect old vehicles from their youth. In the museum, the two are stunned when a man introduces himself as Frank McCallum. Stunned, Jack and Victor invite Frank for dinner, an invitation which he accepts. However, later on, when Jack and Victor are in the kitchen preparing dessert, Frank steals several items from the house (including Victor's tankard and a bottle of whisky) and leaves. Jack and Victor are furious when they realize what has happened. However, the next day, "Frank" (actually a local petty thief named Davie) is ironically hit by a bus, and all of Jack's and Victor's stolen items are recovered, if badly damaged. The pair also make amends with Winston, who has the last laugh by giving a toast in the Clansman and referring to them as "bum chums."

Notes: In the audio commentary track for this episode, Greg Hemphill and Ford Kiernan reveal that the scene with Isa in the lift was added because the episode came up a few minutes short in length. Hemphill and Kiernan did not want to memorize any more lines, so they added a scene in which Isa, played by Jane McCarry, is the only person who speaks.

"Shooglies" is a Scots word for "tram."

"Shooglies" is one of the few episodes of the show to focus entirely on a plotline revolving solely around Jack and Victor. The previous episode, "Scran," had also featured only one plotline, but characters like Navid and Winston had large roles as well.

In the credits, Sanjeev Kohli is listed as playing "Navid Ingram." This is wrong for two reasons; first, Navid's last name is "Harrid" and not "Ingram" ("Ingram" is Winston's surname), and second, Navid does not feature in the episode. Ironically, Jane McCarry is not credited, though she does appear.

Navid exits the back of his shop one morning and is appalled at the mess of rubbish outside. He is annoyed when he finds Pete the Jakey lying in the middle of it. He tells Pete off for going through his rubbish, but Pete claims that a fox had done it in the night. Navid does not believe him. However, Meena later tells Navid that there, in fact, was a fox. Shug happens to be in the shop at the same time, and proposes that they hold a stakeout and try to catch the fox the following night. Navid agrees, and Winston, also in the shop, decides to tag along. That night, Shug brings over the necessary supplies, including (to Winston's and Navid's delight) night-vision goggles. They eagerly camp out outside the back of the shop; however, half an hour later, the fun has worn off. To make matters worse, two police officers pass by, when one decides that he needs to urinate, which he does--all over Navid (who he initially doesn't see). Navid instantly gives away their position, and the he, Winston, and Shug are arrested for loitering. Meanwhile, Jack, Victor, and the others are stunned when Pete walks into the Clansman, wearing a suit and looking well-groomed. The others are hugely skeptical of Pete's "transformation," and tease him mercilessly. Pete is furious, and vows that they will soon see that he him at the opening of the new Craiglang Community Center. Jack and Victor are intrigued, and decide to trail Pete for a day. They follow his path into a building in central Glasgow, where they catch him walking into a lift with two suited men. Convinced that Pete is more than he seems, Jack and Victor go to the opening of the Community Center the next day, where they do find Pete standing behind the man conducting the opening ceremony. A crowd of neds is also at the ceremony, and they are hassling the spokesman. When one of them throws an egg at him, Pete leaps into the crowd at them. Jack and Victor are also caught in the ensuing scuffle. Jack, Victor, Pete, and the egg-throwing ned are all arrested. Coincidentally, they are let out at the same time as Navid. Pete confesses that he had only been pretending to know the people in the elevator the previous day (he had seen Jack and Victor following him) and that he had made up the story about being connected to the Craiglang Community Center. Pete says that he had only wanted a bit of respect for a couple of days. Jack and Victor are angry with him, but Navid advises them to forgive him, until Pete reveals that he also lied about the fox. Navid is not happy.

Notes: "Buntin" is the first episode to deal with the possibility that Pete is not all that he seems. The episodes "Who's the Daddy" in Series 4 and "Recipe" in Series 6 also focus on this topic.

Having returned from a rainy shopping trip, Jack and Victor find a video tape on his door step. It turns out the tape is a home video from Fiona, Jack’s daughter, who lives in Canada. Jack gets depressed, lamenting that his family live so far away now. Victor also expresses remorse about his own son, John, living in South Africa but states that they have to let their children choose their own lives. Meanwhile, Isa’s ex-husband Harry has returned. Harry attempts to woo Isa in Navid’s, but is sternly rebuffed by Isa who wants nothing more to do with him. In the Clansman, Boaby has a “Guess the Name of the Dog” competition to win a robot dog. A distraught Isa enters the pub after a tense confrontation with Harry. The locals attempt to console Isa, however, it transpires that Isa told Harry she’s got a new man. When Harry enters, Winston buys Isa’s drink to pretend that he is Isa’s new boyfriend, but Harry does not believe them. Just then, it is announced that Victor has won the competition as the dog’s name is Matthew. The robotic dog turns out to be problematic – Victor’s attempts to train him fail at every turn and corner as Matthew displays suicidal tendencies. Jack chats to Fiona on the phone and she proposes that Jack comes out to Canada on holiday to visit them. Jack is unsure, but Victor convinces him. In turn, Jack suggests that Victor should phone John and ask if he could visit South Africa. As predicted by Victor, John turns him down. Victor is angry at Jack for pushing him into phoning John, as he knew what would happen. Jack tries to invite Victor to come along with him to Canada, but Victor angrily refuses to be a "charity case" and this causes the long time friends to fall out. Harry continues to follow Winston and Isa, determined to catch them out. Eventually, Harry enters the flat as he still has his keys, and catches Winston and Isa dry humping on the bed. Although highly embarrassed, Isa patiently tries to explain to Harry that their marriage has finished. Finally, Harry accepts defeat and leaves Isa alone. The night before Jack is due to fly out to Canada, Victor meets Jack in the Clansman and apologises for his behaviour. The two friends reconcile. Next morning on the flight, Victor arrives and admits that he booked the same flight as Jack the previous day. The two friends fly out to Canada. In the post credits scene, Winston and Isa are still going out with each other and have inherited Matthew, who is a lot happier.

Notes: This episode has Jack and Victor's first significant rift.

Jack and Victor arrive in Canada to visit Fiona. Just like in Scotland, the two get up to more mischief than the usual pensioners. Back home, Winston tries to ignore Isa's gossip while still enjoying her home cooking as he continues seeing her even though Harry has left.

Jack and Victor are back in Craiglang and on the hunt for more adventures - in this case enrolling in a night class for a first-aid course. When they release how cheap the alcohol is in the University they decide to skip classes. They enter with Winston into The Clansman quiz, but when a woman goes into Labour Jack & Victor are put forward to help.

Jack and Victor enlist the help of their friends and set about winning back disabled Joe's electric scooter from Tam who won it in a poker game. Shug is arrested on suspicion of being a peeping-tom and Lady Luck shines on Winston as his long-shot accumulator bet at the bookie's returns a big win - or does it?

Jack and Victor need a favour from old friend, Big Innes, who has moved away from Craiglang to a remote area. The neds are out of control and Big Innes is just the man to sort them out! However, it is emphasised to everybody that Innes must not be given Midori liqueur under any circumstances. Winston joins the staff of "Food-Fare" and deals with work-place bullying in his own unique way.

Long time recluse, Archie, has no option but to leave his home which is earmarked for demolition. Oblivious to world events and bewildered by all the changes over the decades, he re-enters society under the care of Jack and Victor. Winston inquires about a new, large screen, wall-mounted television in the High Street, but when he sees the price makes plans to build his own. He invites Archie along with Jack, Victor and the other Clansman regulars to a demonstration of his home made cinema in his living room, but the contraption catches fire whilst the group are watching The Towering Inferno. Archie returns to find his flat has been burgled, but the thieves didn't find 40 years worth of social security money stashed inside his sofa. He decides to return to living in isolation, but reveals to Jack and Victor he spent the hoarded money on expensive furnishings for his home.

Isa is frantic with worry after a psychic in The Clansman tells her she is going to be run over by a silver car. Will she meet her date with destiny? Winston is told by doctors his leg will need to be amputated, a consequence of years of heavy smoking. He takes solace in the news that he will qualify for extra money in invalidity benefits. On seeing Winston's leg, Jack throws his pipe in a bin pledging never to smoke again. And Victor fakes illness in a bid to get more attention from his absent son John.

Jack and Victor's friend, Wullie, is dating a younger woman. Rumours abound in Craiglang that his mistress is trying to bump him off. Meanwhile Winston struggles with his new leg and a young hooligan is conning pensioners out of money.

Jack and Victor take up the job of the local hospital's radio DJs as stand-ins for Tam who is away on holiday and build up quite a fanbase in the process. Navid also ends up in hospital with a very personal problem.

Jack and Victor find themselves on a terrifying bus journey when the driver, Davie, suffers a psychotic episode. Meanwhile Tam decides to tag along while Navid goes to get stock and Bobby decides to take time off to go cycling, leaving The Clansman in the charge of a temporary barman. Winston takes advantage of Bobby's absence by pretending to be the real owner of The Clansman.

Tam decides to marry Frances, his sweetheart from the second series. As always in Craiglang, things never go to plan. Meanwhile Navid's shop is part of a big business take-over.

Jack has got Sky Digital TV, Victor hasn't, they solve this problem by arranging for Shug to put a "hatch" put in between their rooms so that they can both watch. But things go wrong when Isa suspects they are gay. Meanwhile, Winston has to look after his neddy grandson while his parents are on holiday.

Jack, Victor and Winston fear they may have fathered a child in their twenties, but they are unsure who it may be. The child in question is also part of the plan to demolish The Clansman.

Jack and Victor fear for their usual Christmas dinner arrangement after they upset Isa and Winston gets to grips with his turkey. Meanwhile Frances gives Tam a ton of Christmas cards for him to deliver.

Jack and Victor learn about free whisky tasting sessions and win a visit to a distillery. Winston is in no mood to welcome the new bookie to Craiglang, being certain that it's his old nemesis, Stevie.

The pensioners put on their decorator's overalls to redesign Isa's flat. In their usual style, the two have trouble adjusting to the job at hand. Meanwhile Tam discovers a video featuring Bobby and some scantily clad women.

Jack and Victor sail in celebration of Victor's 75th birthday. The two decide, along with Winston, to take a sail down the local river. Unfortunately, a run-in with the local neds means things won't go smoothly.

Boaby the Barman has a chance to be on television. Unbeknownst to him at first, the programme is Blighty's Hardest Boozers. Meanwhile, Navid goes through some changes when he dyes his hair.

A sad farewell to Winston as he leaves Craiglang for a new life in the seaside resort of Finport. Meanwhile Jack and Victor are chauffeurs for the day.

Frances's sister, Molly, comes to visit and makes a huge impression on Tam who is in awe of his sister-in-law's tight-fistedness. Meanwhile, Jack and Victor arrange to visit Winston in Finport but when they arrive, they find that all is not well.

Similar to the previous stage play (see History) Jack, Victor and Winston (also Isa in this version) are stuck in the Osprey Heights lift on their way to a Hogmanay party, they reminisce about Hogmanay 1975 (featuring flashbacks).

Craiglang is in the grip of a heat wave. Jack and Victor have found the perfect place to relax in the park on the ultimate bench. Unfortunately, Tam and Winston have the same idea. Isa receives bad news about her estranged husband Harry.

Jack and Victor get a taste of how the other half live when they pose as two wealthy socialites to impress a couple of widows. But the gang from Craiglang are not happy at missing out.

After an accident at the local sub station involving a runaway lorry, Craiglang is plunged into darkness. After a crime wave occurs, the vulnerable pensioners start taking radical measures to protect themselves from the night crawlers.

When a new pizza shop opens in Craiglang, Boabby the barman and Stevie the bookie battle it out for the affection of the new pizza girl. Jack and Victor are hell bent on getting a free pizza now that their old pal Winston works there.

Navid's business is suffering at the hands of the new corporate giant Hyperdales and his regular customers' loyalty is being put to the test. Meanwhile, an electric shock causes Tam to go through some bizarre changes in behaviour. Eventually, Navid cracks and tries to burn down Hyperdales causing him, Jack, Victor, Winston and Tam's to be locked in for the night.

Jack and Victor discover Pete the Jakey was the inventor of the famous BeefyBake and seek recompense on his behalf. Tam and Frances are having marital problems. Who can offer counsel, Navid?

Tam and Frances enjoy fame and fortune with their new addition but it means baby sitting stints for Jack and Victor which is proving a bit of a strain. As both wind up in hospital and Jack is diagnosed with a life-threatening condition, could this be the end for the duo?

Jack and Victor join the choir. Winston offers to cover for the lollipop man while he's away after learning that the job can be very rewarding during Christmas. Boaby gets a new puggy for The Clansman that boasts a jackpot of £1000. Tam enlists the help of Shug and Eric to intercept the slot machine's pay-out ratio but soon, they are joined by Jack and Victor who want their slice of the action.

Jack, Victor, Winston and Tam decide to spend their Hogmanay in a cottage on the remote island of Tighnahulish. Their celebrations are short-lived though when Jack and Victor manage to antagonise the island's few residents. Meanwhile, in Craiglang, Navid's wife Meena has gone on holiday to India, leaving Navid to enjoy a brief taste of single life.

When Jack is faced with the dilemma of attending his daughter's vow renewal in Canada, he decides to embrace new technology - Boaby the barman's tablet - in an attempt to be there from the comfort of The Clansman. However, Victor's promise to be a supportive wing man backfires while Isa tries her best to hold her tongue. Meanwhile Winston needs a new leg thanks to an incident at the canal, Isa's mushroom soup needs a new recipe, Navid has money in mind at the live shows, while Tam and Boaby face a battle of wills against each other.

Jack and Victor win tickets to see River City being filmed and Isa Turns a new Career in becoming an Extra.

Craiglang's residents can't resist the temptation of the Futuroo catalogue and its innovations to 'make life that wee bit easier'. However, it quickly becomes apparent these gadgets do anything but. Winston receives a registered letter which sees him prepare for the arrival of his brother, Walter. As Jack and Victor spar over whose gadget is best, there's a spot of sibling rivalry between Winston and Walter.

Jack and Victor receive the sad news that dear old friend, Pete the Jakey, has died. Pete may have been homeless but he held a special place in the heart of Craiglang's community. However, as everyone gathers at the Clansman after Pete's funeral, tight-fisted Tam still can't find it in himself to contribute to the kitty. Beyond the grave, Pete leaves his legacy with Boabby and Winston through his pal, Methadone Mick.

Charity begins at home, as Jack and Victor offer a helping hand to Methadone Mick; a parking fine from the past comes back to haunt Winston for £4000 and Boabby's award glory goes awry when he has to decide who to take to the City Chambers when he receives his Citizen Civic Medal

Affairs of the heart stir up emotions as Jack and Victor offer unconventional marriage guidance to Fergie and his wife Sinead, their advice proves to be less that helpful. Meanwhile, Navid and Boabby job-swap to prove who has the cushiest career after Boabby struggles to see bargains in Navid's shop when him and Meena have a special rollback day to celebrate 40 years of their Craiglang Career.

Jack and Victor decide to become dog sitters and enlist the help of computer-savvy Isa to register them on the 'Pets Home From Home' website. Meanwhile Isa limbers up for the Craiglang Bake Off and locks whisks with local cake rival, Peggy. Utterly determined to beat the reigning baking champion, Isa strong-arms her pals into becoming reluctant cake-tasting guinea pigs.

Emotions run high as Jack, Victor and the residents gather to watch the demolition of a Craiglang tower block, Tam drags Winston into a new moneymaking scheme, and Jack and Victor are enticed by Mrs Fletcher, the beguiling manager of the local care home.