Everybody Says Don't (Desperate Housewives season two episode)

This article is about the season 2 Desperate Housewives episode. For the season 5 episode of the same title, see Everybody Says Don't (season five episode). For the Stephen Sondheim song, see Anyone Can Whistle.
"Everybody Says Don't"
Desperate Housewives episode
Episode no. Season 2
Episode 18
Directed by Tom Cherones
Teleplay by
Story by
  • Jim Lincoln
Production code 218
Original air date April 2, 2006
Guest appearance(s)

"Everyone Says Don't" is the 41st episode of the ABC television series, Desperate Housewives. The episode was the 18th episode for the show's second season. The episode was written by Jenna Bans and Alexandra Cunningham with a story by Jim Lincoln and was directed by Tom Cherones. It originally aired on April 2, 2006.

Due to time constraints, the opening credits were cut.

Plot

Lynette is forced to give a deposition in regards to Andrew's pending lawsuit involving Bree, because Bree lost track of her children while under the influence of alcohol. Bree continues to deny this but must reconcile with Lynette in order to make things run smoothly. They both eventually come to terms but Lynette tells Bree that she is going to be honest with the lawyer. This disappoints Bree who had expected Lynette to lie. Bree decides that she does not want this to ruin their friendship and makes Lynette a muffin basket. When Lynette sees proof that Bree has been abusive, she cannot help but deny that this actually happened since Andrew is very vindictive. While talking with Andrew and luring him with a car, Lynette learns the truth and has made her decision. At the court interrogation, Lynette lies stating that Bree is a very good mother and friend and never would endanger her children. The lawyer warns her that she is under oath and can be charged with perjury. Lynette understands this but sticks to her new story. She then says she hates liars and looks at Andrew.

Gabrielle and Carlos buy Libby yet another gift in order to ensure that Libby will allow them to adopt her baby. At the strip club, they meet Libby's boyfriend Frank who believes that Libby will be raising the baby. Gabrielle and Carlos are shocked at this since now they will not be able to get the baby. At the lawyer's office the Solises tell this to him who warned them not to give Libby gifts since it is not in the contract. They are then forced to get consent forms from Frank since he still has custody of the child. The Solises then attempt to bribe Frank but soon learn that he is not the baby's father. At the hospital a day later, Libby gives birth to a healthy baby girl who Gabrielle immediately falls in love with. As they hold the baby, Libby confesses to Frank who is on the verge of suicide who the actual father is. When Libby tells Frank that the father is his brother, Gabrielle and Carlos storm out of the hospital with the baby and take it home in order to ensure that they keep her.

After Edie tells Susan that she is planning a surprise wedding at their "engagement party", Susan and Karl are forced to confess their marriage to Edie who still does not know. As they are about to tell Edie, she already has company: Dr. Ron, who has told Edie everything about their relationship. Edie throws a vase and is very angry at the both of them. In order to keep Edie quiet and happy, Karl agrees to throw Edie a lavish wedding and Susan is forced to make all of the arrangements and to be her bartender at the engagement party. At the engagement party, Felicia presents Edie and Karl with a gift: her sister Martha Huber's teeth in the hope of reminding everyone that Paul killed her sister. Paul is then humiliated and forced to leave the party. Also, at the engagement party, Karl reveals his feelings for Susan and kisses her.

Bree warms up to her AA sponsor Peter who in addition to being an alcoholic is a sex addict. When Bree tries to kiss him, he proceeds to take off his clothes and have sex with Bree on the table. His instincts then force him to stop when he becomes very energetic and rough. The following day, Peter introduces Bree to her new AA sponsor, Donna who is a tough and unfriendly woman who claims not to be a lesbian. Immediately, Bree wants Peter back and tries to win him over by calling him but is rebuffed. In order to get Peter back, Bree becomes extremely drunk at a bar and calls Peter to drive her home. Peter helps her and makes her coffee.

Cast

Although credited, Betty Applewhite (Alfre Woodard), Tom Scavo (Doug Savant), Zach Young (Cody Kasch), Danielle Van de Kamp (Joy Lauren), Matthew Applewhite (Mehcad Brooks), Caleb Applewhite (Nashawn Kearse), Preston Scavo (Brent Kinsman), Porter Scavo (Shane Kinsman), and Parker Scavo (Zane Huett) do not appear in this episode.

Crew

This was the first episode in the show's history to have a separate listing for the episode writer(s) and for the person who created the story.

Title reference

The episode title is that of the song "Everybody Says Don't", which was sung by J. Bowden Hapgood in the Stephen Sondheim musical Anyone Can Whistle. The title shares its name with a season 5 episode, however in the Season 2 DVD Booklet, it is revealed to be Everyone Says Don't, making it technically different.

International titles

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