Coming of age

For other uses, see Coming of Age (disambiguation).

Coming of age is a young person's transition from being a child to being an adult. The certain age at which this transition takes place changes in society, as does the nature of the change.[1] It can be a simple legal convention or can be part of a ritual or spiritual event, as practiced by many societies. In the past, and in some societies today, such a change is associated with the age of sexual maturity (early adolescence), especially menarche and spermarche.[2] In others, it is associated with an age of religious responsibility. Particularly in western societies, modern legal conventions which stipulate points in late adolescence or early adulthood (most commonly 18-21 when adolescents are generally no longer considered minors and are granted the full rights and responsibilities of an adult) are the focus of the transition. In either case, many cultures retain ceremonies to confirm the coming of age, and significant benefits come with the change.

Coming of age is often a topic of fiction, in the form of a coming-of-age story. In written literature, a novel which deals with the psychological and moral growth often associated with coming of age is sometimes called a bildungsroman. Similar stories that are told in film are called coming-of-age films.



Apache boys and girls, when they come of age undergo a four-day ritual to achieve their adulthood. This process is called "naive's". For the women, it's a grueling task involving multiple hours of dancing, prayer, and lessons, of self-esteem, sexuality, and healing.


Turning 15, the "age of maturity," as the Baha'i faith terms it, is a time when a child is considered spiritually mature.. Declared Baha'is that have reached the age of maturity are expected to begin observing certain Baha'i laws, such as obligatory prayer and fasting.[3]


Theravada boys, typically just under the age of 20 years, undergo a Shinbyu ceremony, where they are initiated into the Temple as Novice Monks (Samanera). They will typically stay in the monastery for between 3 days and 3 years, most commonly for one 3-month "rainy season retreat" (vassa), held annually from late July to early October. During this period the boys experience the rigors of an orthodox Buddhist monastic lifestyle a lifestyle that involves celibacy, formal voluntary poverty, absolute nonviolence, and daily fasting between noon and the following day's sunrise.

Depending on how long they stay, the boys will learn various chants and recitations in the canonical language (Pali) typically the Buddha's more famous discourses (Suttas) and verses (Gathas) as well as Buddhist ethics and higher monastic discipline (Vinaya). If they stay long enough and conditions permit, they may be tutored in the meditative practices (bhavana, or dhyana) that are at the heart of Buddhism's program for the self-development of alert tranquillity (samadhi), wisdom (prajna), and divine mental states (brahmavihara).

After living the novitiate monastic life for some time, the boy, now considered to have "come of age," will either take higher ordination as a fully ordained monk (a bhikkhu) or will (more often) return to lay life. In Southeast Asian countries, where most pracitioners of Theravada Buddhism reside, women will often refuse to marry a man who has not ordained temporarily as a Samanera in this way at some point in his life. Men who have completed this Samanera ordination and have returned to lay life are considered primed for adult married life and are described in the Thai language and the Khmer language by terms which roughly translate as "cooked," "finished," or "cooled off" in English, as in meal preparation/consumption. Thus, one's monastic training is seen to have prepared one properly for familial, social, and civic duty and/or one's passions and unruliness of the boy are seen to have "cooled down" enough for him to be of use to a woman as a proper man.


Confucianism had a ceremony called Guan Li for young men, and a ceremony called Ji Li, for young women. At around the age of 20, they would receive their style name.

Western Christianity

In many Western Christian churches (those deriving from Rome after the East-West Schism), a young person celebrates his/her Coming of Age with the Sacrament of Confirmation. (In Eastern Orthodoxy the baptising priest gives Confirmation to infants, directly after baptism.) This is usually done by the Bishop laying his hands upon the foreheads of the young person (usually between the ages of 12 to 15 years), and marking them with the seal of the Holy Spirit. In some denominations during this sacrament the child (now an adult in the eyes of God) adopts a confirmation name which is added onto their Christian name.

First Communion in Mexico City, Mexico.

In Christian denominations that practice Believer's Baptism (baptism by voluntary decision, as opposed to baptism in early infancy), the ritual can be carried out after the age of accountability has arrived. Some traditions withhold the rite of Holy Communion from those not yet at the age of accountability, on the grounds that children do not understand what the sacrament means. In the 20th century, Roman Catholic children began to be admitted to communion some years before confirmation, with an annual First Communion service - a practice that was extended to some paedobaptist Protestant groups - but since the Second Vatican Council the withholding of confirmation to a later age, e.g. mid-teens in the United States, early teens in Ireland and Britain, has in some areas been abandoned in favour of restoring the traditional order of the three sacraments of initiation.[4][5][6][7]

In some denominations, full membership in the Church, if not bestowed at birth, often must wait until the age of accountability and frequently is granted only after a period of preparation known as catechesis. The time of innocence before one has the ability to understand truly the laws of God and that God sees one as innocent is also seen as applying to individuals who suffer from a mental disability which prevents them from ever reaching a time when they are capable of understanding the laws of God. These individuals are thus seen, according to some Christians, as existing in a perpetual state of innocence.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS Church) sets the minimum age for baptism at 8 years of age and calls this the "age of accountability," as set forth in LDS Scripture. All persons younger than 8 are considered innocent and incapable of sinning.[8] The LDS Church considers mentally challenged individuals whose mental age is under 8 to be in a perpetual state of innocence, similar to other Christian churches.

Ancient Greek religion

In certain states in Ancient Greece, such as Sparta and Crete, adolescent boys were expected to enter into a mentoring relationship with an adult man, in which they would be taught skills pertaining to adult life, such as hunting, martial arts and fine arts.

Ancient Rome

The puberty ritual for the young Roman male involved shaving his beard and taking off his bulla, an amulet worn to mark and protect underage youth, which he then dedicated to his household gods, the Lares.[9] He assumed the toga virilis ("toga of manhood"), was enrolled as a citizen on the census, and soon began his military service.[10] Traditionally, the ceremony was held on the Liberalia, the festival in honor of the god Liber, who embodied both political and sexual liberty, but other dates could be chosen for individual reasons.[11]

Rome lacked the elaborate female puberty rituals of ancient Greece, and for girls the wedding ceremony was in part a rite of passage for the bride. Girls coming of age dedicated their dolls to Artemis, the goddess most concerned with girlhood, or to Aphrodite when they were preparing for marriage.[12] All adolescents in ritual preparation to transition to adult status wore the tunica recta, the "upright tunic," but girls wove their own. The garment was called recta because it was woven by tradition on a type of upright loom that had become archaic in later periods.[13]

Roman girls were expected to remain virgins until marriage, but boys were often introduced to heterosexual behaviors by a prostitute.[14] The higher the social rank of a girl, the sooner she was likely to become betrothed and married.[15] The general age of betrothal for women of the upper classes was fourteen, but for patricians as early as twelve. Weddings, however, were often postponed until the girl was considered mature enough. Males typically postponed marriage till they had served in the military for some time and were beginning their political career, around age 25. Patrician males, however, might marry considerably earlier; Julius Caesar was married for the first time by the age of 18.

On the night before the wedding, the bride bound up her hair with a yellow hairnet she had woven. The confining of her hair signifies the harnessing of her sexuality within marriage. Her weaving of the tunica recta and the hairnet demonstrated her skill and her capacity for acting in the traditional matron's role as custos domi, "guardian of the house."[16] On her wedding day, she belted her tunic with the cingulum, made from the wool of a ewe to symbolize fertility and tied with the "knot of Hercules", which was supposed to be hard to untie.[17] The knot symbolized wifely chastity, in that it was to be untied only by her husband, but the cingulum also symbolized that the bridegroom "was belted and bound" to his wife.[18] The bride's hair was ritually styled in "six tresses" (seni crines), and she was veiled until uncovered by her husband at the end of the ceremony, a ritual of surrendering her virginity to him.[19]


In Hinduism coming of age generally signifies that a boy or girl is mature enough to understand his responsibility towards family and society. Hinduism also has the sacred thread ceremony, called Upanayana for Dvija (twice-born) boys that marks their coming of age to do religious ceremonies. Girls often celebrate their coming to age by having a ceremony called a Ritushuddhi, upon receiving her first menstruation cycle. This ceremony includes dressing them in a sari, and announcing their maturity to the community.

Ifá (Yoruba mysticism)

In the traditional faith of the Yoruba people of West Africa and the many New World religions that it subsequently gave birth to, men and women are often initiated to the service of one of the hundreds of subsidiary spirits that serve the Orisha Olodumare, the group's conception of the Almighty God. The mystic links that are forged by way of these initiations, which typically occur at puberty, are the conduits that are used by adherents to attempt to achieve what can be seen as the equivalent of the Buddhist enlightenment by way of a combination of personalized meditations, reincarnations and spirit possessions.


Children are not required to perform any obligatory religious obligations prior to reaching the age of puberty, although they are encouraged to begin praying at the age of seven. Once a person begins puberty, they are required to perform salat and other obligations of Islam.[20]

A girl is considered an adult at the age of nine, while a boy is considered an adult at fifteen years old. The evidence for this is the narration of Ibn Umar that he said: "Allah's Apostle called me to present myself in front of him on the eve of the battle of Uhud, while I was fourteen years of age at that time and he did not allow me to take part in that battle but he called me in front of him on the eve of the battle of the Trench when I was fifteen years old, and he allowed me to join the battle." (Reported by Bukhari and Muslim). When Umar Ibn Abdul Aziz heard this Hadith he made this age the evidence to differentiate between a mature and an immature person.


In the Jewish faith, boys reach religious maturity at the age of thirteen and become a bar mitzvah ("bar mitzvah" means "son of the commandment" literally, and "subject to commandments" figuratively). Girls mature a year earlier, and become a bat mitzvah ("bat mitzvah" means "daughter of the commandment") at twelve. The new men and women are looked upon as adults and are expected to uphold the Jewish commandments and laws. Also, in religious court they are adults and can marry with their new title of an adult. Nonetheless in the Talmud; Pirkei Avot (5:25), Rabbi Yehuda ben Teime gives the age of 18 as the appropriate age to get married. At the end of the bar or bat mitzvah, the boy or girl is showered with candies, which act as "sweet blessings." Besides the actually ceremony, there usually is a bar or bat mitzvah party.


In the Romani religion, when boys come of age of 20, they become Shave, and girls become Sheya. Boys are then taught to drive and work in their family's line of trade, while girls are taught the women's line of work.[21]


In the Shinto faith, boys were taken to the shrine of their patron deity at approximately 14 years old. They were then given adult clothes and a new haircut. This was called Genpuku.


In Sikhism, when one reaches the appropriate age of maturity, Amrit is consumed in a ceremony called Amrit Sanchar.


Australia, NZ, UK, Ireland, Poland, Ukraine and Scandinavia

The coming of age in Australia, New Zealand, the United Kingdom, Ireland, Ukraine, the Republic of Poland and the Scandinavian Countries are celebrated at either 18 or 21. As the age of legal majority, being 18 legally enables one to vote, purchase tobacco and alcohol (wine in Norway), get married without parental consent (although one can do this at 16 in Scotland, Australia and New Zealand) and sign contracts. In comparison, turning 21 has few legal effects (except Poland & Ukraine, where all the laws are applied after 18). Eighteenth or twenty-first birthday celebrations typically take the form of an extravagant party; presents given are often higher than usual value, and champagne may be served, as at other formal celebrations. There are few set ceremonies or rituals to be observed, although if the celebrant is a male he may be challenged to consume the contents of a yard glass which is typically full of beer.

Drinking plays a large part in 18th birthdays, as it is the age where one can legally purchase alcohol. As such, many 18th birthdays are celebrated with a large party with friends, with drinking as a central motif. Despite 18 being the legal age of adulthood, most do not immediately take on the roles of adults, such as moving out of home or gaining full-time employment, instead studying or working as an apprentice. At New Zealand and Australian 18th and sometimes 21st birthdays (increasingly 18th), it is customary for family members to assemble embarrassing photos, videos or other childhood memorabilia to display at a celebration and for a good friend to give an equally embarrassing speech.


In some countries Humanist or freethinker organisations have arranged courses or camps for non-religious adolescents, in which they can study or work on ethical, social and personal topics important for adult life, followed by a formal rite of passage comparable to the Christian Confirmation. Some of these ceremonies are even called "civil confirmations". The purpose of these ceremonies is to offer a festive ritual for those youngsters, who do not believe in any religion, but nevertheless want to mark their transition from childhood to adulthood.[22]

Latin America

In some Latin American countries, when a girl reaches the age of 15, her relatives usually organize a very expensive celebration. It is usually a large party, called a Quinceañera in Spanish speaking countries and Baile de Debutantes in Brazil. For boys there is no formal ritual of transition. At 18 one is legally considered an adult, can vote, and legally purchase/use alcohol, tobacco and cigarettes.

North America

In North America, when a girl turns 16 years old, she has a sweet sixteen birthday party.

In the United States, when a child reaches the age of 16 they are allowed to drive, in some states, and sometimes receives the responsibility of owning their own car, and is also old enough to donate blood and work in most establishments. At 18 one is legally considered an adult, can vote, and legally purchase/use tobacco and cigarettes. The legal age for alcohol and recreational marijuana, the latter of which is only legal in the District of Columbia, Colorado, Oregon, Washington, California, Massachusetts, Nevada, and Alaska, is 21.

In Canada, a person aged 16 and over can legally drive a car and work, but are only considered to be an adult at age 18 like in the US. In most provinces, the legal age to purchase alcohol and cigarettes is 19, except in Alberta, Manitoba, and Quebec where it is 18 years old.


In Spain during the 19th century, there was a civilian coming of age bound to the compulsory military service. The quintos were the boys of the village that reached the age of eligibility for military service (18 years), thus forming the quinta of a year. In rural Spain, the mili was the first and sometimes the only experience of life away from family. In the days before their departure, the quintos knocked every door to ask for food and drink. They held a common festive meal with what they gathered and sometimes painted some graffiti reading "Vivan los quintos del año" as a memorial of their leaving their youth. Years later, the quintos of the same year could still hold yearly meals to remember times past. By the end of the 20th century, the rural exodus, the diffusion of city customs and the loss of prestige of military service changed the relevance of quintos parties. In some places, the party included the village girls of the same age, thus becoming less directly relevant to military service. In others, the tradition was simply lost.


Main article: Coming of Age Day

Since 1948, the age of majority in Japan has been 20; persons under 20 are not permitted to smoke, drink, or vote. Coming-of-age ceremonies, known as seijin shiki, are held on the second Monday of January. At the ceremony, all of the men and women participating are brought to a government building and listen to many speakers, similar to a graduation ceremony. At the conclusion of the ceremony Government officials give speeches, and small presents are handed out to the new adults.

Papua New Guinea

Kovave is a ceremony to initiate Papua New Guinea boys into adult society. It involves dressing up in a conical hat which has long strands of leaves hanging from the edge, down to below the waist. The name Kovave is also used to describe the head-dress.


During the feudal period, the coming of age was celebrated at 15 for noblemen. Nowadays, the age is 18 for girls and 20 for boys.


In Bali, the coming of age ceremony is supposed to take place after a girl's first menstrual period or a boy's voice breaks. However, due to expense, it is often delayed until later. The upper canines are filed down slightly to symbolize the effacing of the individual's "wild" nature.


In the rite of initiation of Baka Pygmies, the Spirit of the Forest ritually kills the boys to propitiate their rebirth as men.


In Korea, citizens are permitted to marry, vote, drive, drink alcohol, and smoke at age 19.

The Monday of the third week of May is "coming-of-age day". On that day, those entering adulthood are to receive three gifts: flowers, perfume and a kiss. There has been a traditional coming of age ceremony since before Goryeo dynasty, but it has mostly disappeared. In the traditional way, when boys or girls were between the ages of fifteen and twenty, boys wore gat, a Korean traditional hat made of bamboo and horsehair, and girls did their hair in chignon with binyeo, a Korean traditional ornamental hairpin. Both of them wore hanbok, and wearing hanbok on the coming of age ceremony can be sometimes seen even now.


Main article: Philippine Debut

In the Philippines, a popular coming of age celebration for 18-year-old women is the debut. It is normally a formal affair, with a strict dress code such as a coat and tie for the upper-middle and upper classes, and usually has a theme or color scheme that is related to the dress code. The débutante traditionally chooses for her entourage "18 Roses", who are 18 special men or boys in the girl's life such as boyfriends, relatives and brothers, and "18 Candles", who are the Roses' female counterparts. Each presents a rose or candle then delivers a short speech about the debutante. The Roses sometimes dance with the débutante before presenting their flower and speech, with the last being her father or boyfriend. Other variations exist, such as 18 Treasures (of any gender; gives a present instead of a candle or flower) or other types of flowers aside from roses being given, but the significance of "18" is almost always retained.

Filipino men, on the other hand, celebrate their debut on their 21st birthday. There is no traditionally set program marking this event, and celebrations differ from family to family. Both men and women may opt not to hold a debut at all.


In Cambodia, a popular coming-of-age celebration takes place at the age of 14. A man will be called "ពេញកំលោ៖" Pheng Kom Lost and a woman will be called "ពេញក្រមុំ" Pheng Kro Mom. The parents must prepare a feast for the celebration. They invite their relatives to come and celebrate their son's or daughter's entrance into adulthood. This event can also serve as an opportunity for the parents to look for potential marriage partners among the offspring of other families attending the celebration. The ceremony usually happens at night-time, but from the morning the celebrator needs to wear the best clothes of their choice and make up in their style and go to some place of their belief to show that they are now becoming an adult.

Professional initiatory rituals


Medical School

White coat ceremony


In many universities of Europe, South America and India, first year students are made to undergo tests or humiliation before being accepted as students. Perhaps the oldest of these is "Raisin Monday"[23] at the University of St Andrews in Scotland. It is still practiced. A senior student would take a new student, a "bejant" or "bejantine" under his/her wing and show them around the university. In gratitude, the bejant would give the senior student a pound of raisins. In turn this led to bejants being given receipts in Latin. If a bejant failed to produce the receipt, he could be thrown into a fountain. The word bejant derives from "bec jaune" (a yellow beak, or fledgling).

Universities in Chile follow an annual ritual called "Mechoneo" (the act of pulling somebody's hair). First year students are initiated by theatrical "punishment". Freshmen are tied together while upperclassmen throw them eggs, flour, water, etc. Some universities have traditional ways of initiating freshmen.

Fraternities and Sororities

Fraternities and sororities have different processes for associate members, also known as pledges, to become a member. It usually takes place with one or more ritual that is specific to that organization and teaches them the core values and beliefs behind their specific organization.

Printing Industry

Among apprentices, the step from apprentice to journeyman was often marked by some ceremonial humiliation. Among printers this lasted until the twentieth century. The unfortunate young man would be "banged out" by being covered in offal.

Coming of age celebration

In several countries, people hold a celebration for children. The celebration is group ceremony.[24]

See also



  1. "Newly Released Books". The New York Times. 20 May 2010.
  2. Joseph, Suad (2003). Encyclopedia of Women & Islamic Cultures. p. 68.
  3. "For Baha'is, turning 15 means more than a birthday - Bahai Faith - Baha'i Faith".
  4. "The Restored Order of Sacraments of Initiation".
  5. "Confirmation before communion, Liverpool decides - CathNews".
  6. Association of Interchurch Families - England. "First Communion".
  7. "The Lost Coin".
  8. Book of Mormon: Moroni 8:5-26, Doctrine and Covenants 68:27
  9. Persius 5.30–31.
  10. Larissa Bonfante, introduction to The World of Roman Costume (University of Wisconsin Press, 2001), p. 7; Shelley Stone, "The Toga: From National to Ceremonial Costume," in The World of Roman Costume, p. 41; Lynn Sebesta, "Women's Costume and Feminine Civic Morality in Augustan Rome," Gender & History 9.3 (1997), p. 533. After the Augustan building program, the rites were held at the new Temple of Mars Ultor in the Forum Augustum: Dominic Montserrat, "Reading Gender in the Roman World," in Experiencing Rome: Culture, Identity, and Power in the Roman Empire (Routledge, 2000), p. 170.
  11. Ariadne Staples, From Good Goddess to Vestal Virgins: Sex and Category in Roman Religion (Routledge, 1998), p. 89; Michelle George, "The 'Dark Side' of the Toga," in Roman Dress and the Fabrics of Roman Culture (University of Toronto Press, 2008), p. 55; Propertius 3.15.3–6; Ovid, Fasti 3.777–778.
  12. Beryl Rawson, Children and Childhood in Roman Italy (Oxford University Press, 2003), p. 48 on Diana; p. 128, citing Persius 2.70 and the related scholion; p. 145 on comparison with Greece.
  13. Sebesta, "Women's Costume," pp. 533–534.
  14. Amy Richlin, "Not before Homosexuality: The Materiality of the cinaedus and the Roman Law against Love between Men," Journal of the History of Sexuality 3.4 (1993), p. 533, citing as example Martial 12.96.
  15. Judith P. Hallett, Fathers and Daughters in Roman Society: Women and the Elite Family (Princeton University Press, 1984), 142; Beryl Rawson, "The Roman Family in Italy" (Oxford University Press, 1999), p. 21.
  16. Sebesta, "Women's Costume," pp. 529, 534, 538.
  17. Sebesta, "Women's Costume," pp. 534–535; Festus 55 (edition of Lindsay) on the nodus Herculaneus, which was used for its apotropaic powers on jewelry as well. The Roman Hercules was a giver of fertility and a great scatterer of seed: he fathered, according to Verrius Flaccus, seventy children.
  18. Cinctus vinctusque, according to Festus; Karen K. Hersch, The Roman Wedding: Ritual and Meaning in Antiquity (Cambridge University Press, 2010), pp. 101, 110, 211 .
  19. Sebesta, "Women's Costume," p. 535.
  20. "Islamic obligations at puberty". IslamWeb. October 25, 2001. Retrieved October 12, 2009.
  21. "Roma".
  22. Krause, Klaus-Peter. "Geschichte der Jugendweihe" (in German). Jugendweihe Deutschland e.V. Archived from the original on 2008-05-26. Retrieved 2007-11-15.
  23. "". Retrieved 2013-12-31.
  24. "مراسم جشن تکلیف دختران نوآموز قرآنی مرکز اسلامی انگلیس + تصاویر". Retrieved 29 April 2015. External link in |website= (help)

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